Just A Simple Interview

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"Hey! Hi, so sorry I'm late, I just...I'm so sorry, really. I had hoped to get here like, fifteen minutes ago, but that's why I wanted us to meet at the diner. Food takes your mind off the waiting, yeah? Haha!" [["I'm sorry, remind me who you are again?"]] [["Not a problem. Amanda, right?"]] [["Is this how you always make your interviewees wait? The food's not even good here."]] [["I'm just glad you made it! Was starting to think that this was all a scam of some sort, haha."]]

"No problem! I'm Amanda Stykes, HR for the Fortune 500 Company called LazyTown Co, who despite their name has a goal of increasing children's physical health and eliminating the obesity problem that's currently rising in our great America! "Have you ever heard of LazyTown Co?" [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"Yes! That's me, Amanda Stykes. We're interviewing for the position at LazyTown Co. Have you ever heard of them?" [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"...ah...I'm...sorry. Everyone raves about this diner's burgers and fries combo. And no, usually i"m on time. Let's...let's just move on from this, shall we? Have you had a chance to look at our company website?" [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"Haha, would be a pretty intense scam considering we've already had you do the drug test and the first round of group interviews! Although, I guess things have always been stranger. "Before we get started, let me introduce our company, LazyTown Co. Have you ever heard of it?" [["Yeah, about that, I was just wondering. Were all those people really there for this position? It just seems...I dunno, a little weird."]] [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"Right then, I'll explain the position then. "LazyTown Co's aim is to reduce childhood obesity, but many don't envision that this would entail important steps like social media upkeep or technology issues. Our founders come from the good ol' 50s, so sometimes they tend to think just...flipping a switch is enough. "However, with our recent opening in Texas City, and then in Austin, we've found that we've...taken on a larger burden than we can currently handle. "That's where you come in! Your credentials from MIT and your past experience in start-ups have really caught our eye! We need someone with patience and understanding but with enough current know-how to keep things running." [["...so a glorified IT?"]] [["Oh, so just a regular IT position."]] [["Why is it called The Fixer-Upper Man on the website? Sounds super kiddish."]] [["Well, I do take pride in my work, and I can assure you that I've put my hours in. Even my grandparents will give me glowing reviews! ...heh..."]]

"LazyTown Co was founded in 1970 with the sole purpose of encouraging children to get out and play! The name was meant to be simple and ellicit a little bit of laughter, one of those 'oh why is it named this when they do this' type of...pun, I suppose. "Through the years, they funded many ventures, through the American Heart Association for the jump rope initiative, the Chalk for All program that donated play chalk for schools, and created programs for donating to build, or in some cases rebuild, an entirely new playground that both hits safety goals and makes it fun for the kids to play on! "When Nickelodeon came out with their show with the same name, we were thrilled! They worked hand in hand with our company to encourage children to get out and play, or risk becoming...Lazy. "With the intrusive Covid that downed our great world for the past...few years, getting kids eager to get out and play, or to even get UP and play, has been...hard. You can imagine why it's so imperative that healthy choices are made even while isolating. "Does that answer your question?" [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["Sounds...a little much. I don't know about this."]] [["Wow. That's excessive. It can't really be that bad."]] [["I think the idea sounds really good! I have to agree, kids absolutely need to get out and play more!"]]

"LazyTown Co IS a Fortune 500 company, sir. We're well-received in Forbes Magazine, so even a...somewhat small position as this can be detrimental to most who wish to start their career with a step up, so to say. "We had millions across America apply, thousands just in this little podunk town, and then we slashed and slashed at the list until we happened...with you." [["...I...I'm sorry, did I upset you? It kind of feels like I did."]] [["I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make it sound like that. I was mostly just curious."]] [["Right..."]]

"...I'm sorry for snapping. I care greatly about this company and I get very upset when others don't. They are doing a great job here, every single day, and when people like you act like it's nothing, or it's on par with Walmart... "No. Forget it. Let's start over. "Have you ever heard of LazyTown Co?" [["Wait, people like me?"]] [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"Oh. I'm...sorry for snapping then. I just...I felt really happy to finally get a good candidate for this position, and then I was late, and it felt like you were making this out to be fake... "Again, that was unprofessional of me. Is it alright if we start over? "Let me tell you about our company, LazyTown Co, unless you already read up on us?" [["Hey, it's okay. I can imagine the kind of stress you're under."]] [["Yes, but could you tell me more about what this specific position entails?"]] [["No, I haven't, can you tell me about it?"]]

"I feel like you're not taking this seriously. "You chose us, and in turn, out of millions of others, we chose YOU. "I would cut the attitude if I were you." [["Geeze, what crawled up you and died?"]] [["I'm sorry. I'm just, I guess I feel like this is kind of wasting my time?"]] [["You know what, I don't even want this job. I just wanted to see your face again."]]

"Come now, Mister Johnson. It's far more intricate than that. You're ensuring the health and prosperity of children today and tomorrow!" [["That's...strangely sweet. So what are the hours and pay?"]] [["Do you really believe that? Heh."]] [["Eh, still a glorified IT."]]

"Mm, you can say that, I suppose. "We label it The Fixer-Upper Man to inject a little joy in the soul, you know? Something wild and whacky!" [["It's dumb."]] [["Yeah, fair. I've done a few odd jobs. Mostly they just call me Mister IT. Heh."]] [["Interesting..."]]

"We're a company focused entirely on children, sir. "What do you think?" [["Oof, I harshed the vibe there, huh?"]] [["...I...okay, when you put it THAT way..."]] [["It's dumb."]]

"That's so sweet...you still talk to your grandparents...?" [["Yeah...it's just my grandpa now. Grandma died last year, and I uh..."]] [["Nah, they live far away. And I'm busy."]] [["Not as much as I'd like."]]

"Mister Johnson, if you're already overwhelmed by this little bit of information, this may not be the career for you." [["Wait, I didn't mean it like that."]] [["Yeah, Yeah I guess so. Sorry for wasting your time."]]

"Oh it is, Mister Johnson. We take our position in the business word very seriously. If you can't as well, this job may not be for you. We need someone serious, someone devoted to the cause." [["Yeah, that sounds super cultish."]] [["You're right, I'm not taking it seriously. I don't think we'll be a good fit."]] [["I'm still interested, I just...it feels like a lot, you know?"]]

"That's the spirit, Mister Johnson! While you may not be a public facing entity, it's people like you who keep our corporation alive and working swimmingly with your can-do attitude! "Now, onto the hours and pay..." [["Yes, I'm really interested in this!"]] [["I'm so eager, I don't even care what the hours and pay are now!"]]

"You, Mister Johnson." [["Haha, what?"]]

"Wasting your-? Mister Johnson, if anyone's time is wasted, it's mine. "We picked you, out of millions, out of THOUSANDS, and you want to treat our company like this?" [["I...you're right. I'm sorry. I really do need this job. Can we just...start over?"]] [["Uh...I...I'm sorry, maybe this isn't a good fit for either of us."]] [["Oooookay...I think we're done here, crazy lady."]]

"What the fuck do you mean." [["You know what I mean. You know what I mean, Amanda Young."]]

"Yes. People like you, Mister Johnson. "You don't remember me, do you? "Or, you don't know my married name, I suppose. "Amanda Young?" [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["Not ringing a bell."]] [["Uh...I...I'm sorry, maybe this isn't a good fit for either of us."]]

"...yeah. It's quite stressful, keeping the ship afloat. Heh. I thank you for being considerate of me." [["It's no problem. Hey, how about we eat before we get into the intricacies of it all, huh? Diner's pretty good."]] [["Hey, what are people for, right? You know, this diner's a bit boring. I can take you to my favorite pizza spot, maybe cheer you up a little?"]] [["It's no problem. You look like someone who loves to smile instead of stress. How about a few jokes?"]]

"...I will admit it's a little funny. Sometimes the company leans a little too hard into the children's angle, but it is what it is. We ARE for the children, after all! "Besides the 'kiddish' name, is there any other issue you have? Any questions besides that?" [["That's...strangely sweet. So what are the hours and pay?"]]

"That's cute, Mister Johnson. So, what do you think? Do you want the position?" [["I do, if you'll have me. What are the hours and pay, benefits...?"]] [["I'm interested but...do I know you from somewhere? You're really familiar."]] [["I dunno, it just...sounds weird. Almost cult-like. I may have to pass."]]

"I take it that means you're interested in the job then?" [["Well, how's the hours and pay?"]]

"You don't remember me, do you? "Or, you don't know my married name, I suppose. "Amanda Young?" [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["Not ringing a bell."]] [["Uh...I...I'm sorry, maybe this isn't a good fit for either of us."]]

"You remember. You remember and you don't care, which hurts far more than if you did remember." [["We were kids! I thought it'd be a funny joke and it got out of hand!"]] [["I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I should leave-"]] [["I..."]]

"Too bad. I don't know if you're sincere or just that much of an idiot! And at this point, I just don't care. "Remember that delicious meal you had with the tinge of something you just could not place? Hm? You know how...sleepy you've been getting, that build-up of a cough in your chest?" [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["You bitch."]]

"Run! Run, you bastard! I'll find you every single time! "I WILL FIND YOU AND GET MY REVENGE!" END: Putting Those Stamina Skills To The Test Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"...yes?" [["It's nothing."]] [["Well, if I'm truthful, I'm not really taking the job for myself. I'd rather much be at home taking care of him, but well, bills and he keeps pushing me to get out more...a-anyway, sorry to...I'm sorry. I didn't mean to distract from the conversation."]] [["I did a horrible thing to someone as a kid, and, I mean, you'll find out on the background check anyway that I have a felony, and my grandparents took me in. I was just a self destructive little shit, and they...really set me straight. I want to do good. I want to make them proud."]]

"Ah. Well. We all should appreciate our family while we have them, don't you agree, Mister Johnson?" [["Eh, they got me out of a bad spot once but other than that I don't really talk to them."]] [["...yeah uh...I guess."]] [["...I didn't really think about that, honestly. Maybe I should call them later..."]]

"That's disappointing. Why don't you?" [["Uh, why the sudden interest? Hah..."]] [["I really don't want to go over this. Can we just move on?"]]

"I...alright. I'm sorry to hear about your grandparents. You must have loved them greatly, didn't you?" [["I did. Just wish I had more time to tell them."]] [["I really don't want to go over this. Can we just move on?"]]

"No, no. It's alright. It's good to know our employees care for their families so much. Here, let me order some lunch, and we can talk some more. It seems like you have something to get off your chest..." [["I..."]]

"...did you ever apologize?" [["What?"]] [["I didn't. I wanted to. She was the sole survivor and I know she hates me. I would too."]] [["I tried. I tried so hard. Everything felt hollow. I don't think I can."]]

"Did. You. Ever. Apologize." [["No. I couldn't. I...I can't."]] [["I didn't. I wanted to. She was the sole survivor and I know she hates me. I would too."]] [["I tried. I tried so hard. Everything felt hollow. I don't think I can."]]

"You're right. "She does hate you." [["Amanda...I'm so sorry."]] [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I should leave-"]]

"What do you mean you tried?" [["I wrote letters! To the court and to her new home, and to our friends to give to her, but every word felt wrong and I, I think she tore them up...I can't blame her..."]] [["I tried to call. Every day. She put a restraining order on me. I...have to admit I was a little mad about that but now that I'm older, I can't blame her."]] [["I...shouldn't be getting into all that."]]

"Why not." [["I..."]] [["I'm a coward."]] [["I...I...hate her..."]]

"BURNING MY HOUSE DOWN WITH MY FAMILY INSIDE IT WAS A FUNNY JOKE?!" [["I, I dropped the lighter, I'm so sorry, I just wanted to scare you!"]] [["God, God...help me..."]] [["No! I-I was just trying to show off a trick, I didn't mean to! I wanted to impress you!"]]

"No. "It's too late, anyway." [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["You bitch."]]

"You?" [["Amanda...I'm so sorry."]]

"Sure, let's go over all that right now, oh...there's the waiter. Sir? Can I have...?" END: You're Hired! Hopefully. Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I?" [["Oof, I harshed the vibe there, huh?"]] [["It's dumb."]]

"Sure, let's go over all that right now, oh...there's the waiter. Sir? Can I have...?" END: You're Hired! Hopefully. Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I'm...not sure. My name is Amanda Stykes. Does that ring any bells?" [["Can't say that it does, sorry."]] [["Haha, what?"]] [["Amanda...I think...I know that name somehow."]] [["Of course it does. I was waiting for you to say something."]]

"That's disappointing. While I understand your reservations, I can assure you there is nothing illegal nor immoral about our company, nor anything amounting to a 'cult'. "However, I can see that I cannot persuade you. Thank you for letting me interview you today. Here, let me pay for an extra sandwich and cup of coffee for you, and maybe in the future you'll join our team? "We can't wait to have you one day." END: Too Cult, Didn't Smash Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"You know what, Mister Johnson? I think I'd like that. "I think I'd like that a lot." END: A Rocky Start, But We Got There. Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Oh! I...I don't know. I... "You know what, Mister Johnson? "Let's do it. Let's go to the pizza place. "We'll talk more about the hiring process there...maybe over a drink or two." END: Maybe Something More? Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Jokes? What kind do you have? I think we got time to laugh a little...if you've got anything good, that is!" END: Joke Helps Everyone Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Well you didn't, motherfucker. You killed my parents. You killed my sister. You killed my whole family. I had no one! NO ONE! And what do you get?? "A slap on the wrist and grandparents who homeschool you so no one knows what you did!" [["God, God...help me..."]] [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["You bitch."]]

"God can't save you now. None of them. "Remember that burger you had earlier? When I told you I was running late?" [["No...you didn't."]] [["I...I can't breathe."]]

"I'm so done with you. Every single day was you just doing something, trying to get my attention, trying to piss me off or steal my things. "No more. I'm taking care of this today." [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["God, God...help me..."]]

"When we were ten and holding hands under the bleachers, you told me you were deathly allergic to peanuts. You still are, aren't you? It's why you were fine meeting here, this greasy diner where the closest nut they come to are the baked beans they fry. "But Lee's an old friend of mine. It was nothing to slip some peanut oil in the fryer and make your burger in it, since you drown it in ketchup and hot sauce. "Stop grabbing at your pockets. It's far too late for that. "Don't touch me, either. I don't want you. "Die." END: Allergies Suck Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"The chef's a close friend of mine. The same friend who held me through numerous therapy sessions, the same friend who assured me we'd get our justice when that damn judge locked your records so you'd be clean as a white lamb when you took your steps into the adult world. "I waited. I waited so long." [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["You bitch."]]

"Poison. It's racing through you right now. You've probably felt it this entire time. Your heart's jumping through your skin, you're sweating buckets, you keep pulling at your collar. "Oh, there's blood on your lip now. "Cough into a napkin, you heathen. "And I will sit here, watching with a smile, as you did when my home, when my family, went up in flames. "Hope Hell feels nice, Mister Johnson." END: You Shouldn't Have Eaten Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"As uncouth in death as you were in life. Don't spit at me, bastard. Ew. "You're probably drowning in your own blood now. That'll show you. A little bleach is always fun to mix in with ketchup and hot sauce, the same style you've always loved your entire life. "Pity. I once...cared about you. "You know. Before all that. "I'm going to leave now. I don't want to see what happens. "Good day, Mister Johnson." END: To Die Alone Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I suppose. Let me outline your duties and hourly rate for you. "... "And that's all. We'll take your information into consideration and give you call back in two weeks. Thank you for your time." END: You're So Not Getting That Job Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Crazy? Crazy?! I'll show you crazy, I'll show it to you alright! Where the hell is my purse?!" *BANG* END: A Shot To The Heart, Or Something Like That Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I have to agree, Mister Johnson. It was a pleasure interviewing you. Don't call us." END: Back To Indeed! Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Oh. I suppose I could understand that, yes. "Well, here, let me break it down a bit for you in terms of job expectancy and hours and the like. A lot of people say that it sounds much less overwhelming when we do that...oh, sir? Can we have some coffee? And milk, for me, please. Thank you." END: A Little Much, But We'll Get There Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Well it sounded like it. So do you want to continue or not?" [["Yes please. I'm sorry, again."]]

"It's not a problem. We run into this problem often. If you change your mind, give us a call. We'll keep your resume on file for three months, at which time you'll need to reapply. "Here, let me treat you to some pie before I go..." END: Overwhelmed Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Sure, let's go over all that right now, oh...there's the waiter. Sir? Can I have...?" END: You're Hired! Hopefully. Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"What?" [["You know what, I don't even want this job. I just wanted to see your face again."]]

"Amanda Young. "Amanda Fucking Young." [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["Not ringing a bell."]] [["Uh...I...I'm sorry, maybe this isn't a good fit for either of us."]]

"You should. "You burned my house down and killed my family." [["We were kids! I thought it'd be a funny joke and it got out of hand!"]] [["I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I should leave-"]] [["I..."]]

"Don't we all, Mister Johnson...I'm sorry. Let's start over. Or, here, let me get you a refill on your drink, we'll just...we'll avoid the conversation entirely." END: The Vibes Went South Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Of course. Excuse my ill-manners. I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable. Here, let me get us some refills..." END: Maybe I Should've Tried To Work At Microsoft... Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I think perhaps you should feel a little more empathy to your grandparents. Sounds like they took on a lot for you." [["Eeh, what do you know?"]] [["I...suppose you're right. I haven't been the best grandkid ever."]] [["...yeah uh...I guess."]]

"You sound hesitant." [["You just sounded really...serious all of a sudden. Sounded like I hit a nerve."]] [["Nothing. Never mind. Can we just continue the interview?"]]

"Maybe you should. "I'm sorry. I need to wrap this up. Let's...let's try again later, okay? I'll email you a better time. "...thank you for talking with me." END: Rescheduling Woes Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I...my family is gone and I suppose I never quite understand people whose remaining family members exista nd are kind to them but they never reach out. "Have they done something wrong to you?" [["This is a little invasive."]] [["Uh, no, we just...wasn't this about a job?"]] [["...wait. Wait a minute. Don't I know you?"]]

"I'm so happy! It's been quite a while since I've had such a great interview with someone! ...let me buy you some cheesecake from here, they have some really great desserts. My treat! "And...well...let me be honest, they're low-balling you, Mister Johnson. Give me a few good examples of your work, something to really dazzle them, and I'll get you much more than that measly 80k a year you wanted." END: When HR Works For YOU Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Hah! First time I heard that! Let me outline some things and let's order dessert, and we can get to know each other some more and see how good a fit for our company you really are!" END: HIRED!!! Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"How the hell-" [["I knew from your photo. Still have that scar on your cheek when the flaming door hit you trying to get in your house, did it?"]]

"...you what?" [["I'm so sorry. I was an idiot child, an idiot teen, an idiot man who never thought farther than he could throw."]]

"..." [["And I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for what happened to had happened. It was a total and complete accident."]]

"..." [["And I'm sorry that I never apologized for it. And I'm sorry that all my cowardice amounted to was a court order to stay away from you and some fucking probation and locked records. And I'm sorry because all you had left was an empty, burned house and I still had my grandparents."]]

"..." [["You were my best friend. And I ruined your life. And I don't think I'll ever make up for what happened."]]

"Fuck you. Fuck you, you astonishingly hard-headed buffoon, and I hate you for everything you did and I hate that you're sitting here apologizing when all I want you to do is curse at me or, or act like you don't know me, or do ANYTHING that warrants my intense hatred and want of your death for you. "I...I dreamed about this day. "You. Me. Alone. "A knife. Poison. A gun. "Anything. I wanted my revenge. And I wanted to get it, too. "And now here you are, and here I am, and I feel like we're twelve again and you broke my favorite dollhouse and you're in fucking tears over it begging for forgiveness. "You're not even asking for that, though. You're just. Apologizing. And it's everything I always wanted to hear, too. Just to hear the crack in your voice and the tears on your face as you blubber out apologies." [["..."]]

"...I hate you." [["I hate me, too."]]

"...but I...feel...better. "I thought I'd feel better killing you. "And I probably would. "But...I don't know. Maybe I wanted closure that you felt just as torn up as me. Maybe I wanted to see your life in shambles like mine was. "I don't know. "...but I got what I wanted. "...I think it would be best if we didn't meet again. I know I'm the one who tricked you, but... "...I think...I think I should leave." [["So...the job's off the table?"]] [["Goodbye, Amanda."]]

"Never mind, I'm taking out the gun." JOKE END: What The Fuck, Dude Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"...goodbye, ---. I... "...goodbye." END: True End. Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I mean, you were basically stalking her at that point. Who wouldn't want to rip up the letters?" [["You're right...that's why I had hoped she'd read at least one and maybe...let me know. But it's fine."]] [["Yeah...I...never mind."]] [["Can we not talk about this? It's getting, I dunno, invasive I guess."]]

"You were mad? At her?? For blocking you for basically stalking her?! Get real, Mister Johnson." [["...wait, what?"]] [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["Uh...I...I'm sorry, maybe this isn't a good fit for either of us."]] [["And why shouldn't I be? It's her fault she never answered the phone!"]]

"...you're right. This is completley irresponsible of us to discuss this. I apologize. I'll pay for your meal but I think we should part ways here. "Have a great life, Mister Johnson." END: Steel Trap Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"You are." [["I could never face her."]]

"Are you sure about that?" [["...wait. Wait a minute. Don't I know you?"]]

"...nothing. Never mind. This was a mistake. I...I need to go. Thank you for your time." END: Well, That Was Weird Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"...I suppose...I was rather harsh just now. Not a one of us has been the best child of our family, I suspect." [["Heh, yeah..."]]

"I...forgive me. I'm not feeling well suddenly. "Let's...let's shelve the conversation for a while and I'll go over the rest of the interview. Let me order a Sprite for now..." END: That Was Weird. Got The Job Though! Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"...if you don't mind, let's reconvene another day. I suddenly do not feel well. "Have a good day, Mister Johnson." END: You Didn't Hear Back Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"You're right. I, I'm sorry. I stuck my foot in my mouth. I'm told I do that a lot, heh. "Here, let me start over. I'll explain the hours and pay and benefits as well..." END: Weird (But You Got The Job?) Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"It was." [["...wait. Wait a minute. Don't I know you?"]]

"You should. "You burned my house down and killed my family." [["We were kids! I thought it'd be a funny joke and it got out of hand!"]] [["I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I should leave-"]] [["I..."]] [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["God, God...help me..."]]

"Bastard...bastard! You knew who I was and you still..." [["Of course I did. Because I wanted to see you. Tell you something."]]

"What the hell do you want to say?" [["I..."]] [["Well..."]]

"Spit it out already." [["Mmmm, fine, I suppose. I just wanted to annoy you. Make sure you know I still exist."]]

"What...what the hell..wh-why-" [["Aw, are you gonna cry? Poor, pitiful Amanda. Always dead last. Always alone."]]

"Why are you doing this to me..." [["Because, Amanda. I want to. Anytime you go to sleep, or you look in darkened corners of the room, I want to be the one on your mind. I want to haunt you, daily."]]

"You already do, you bastard! I haven't slept a full night's sleep unmedicated in years! And you think this is funny?!" [["Yup! And now that I've made my appearance, I suppose I'll skedaddle before your friend in the back calls in on me for breaking the restraining order."]]

"No, you can't just leave and escape justice, you fucking-" [["Goodbye, Amanda. I've always loved you. I hope you know that I'm the only one who will."]]

"I'LL KILL YOU! I'LL MURDER YOU IF I SEE YOU EVER AGAIN, I'LL-I'LL-*sobbing* oh God, oh God...please...p...please..." Horrible End: Revenge Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"I...I think we should reschedule this. It was highly unprofessional on my end, and...anyway. Let me pay for your dinner and let's try again, how about next week? "Oh, sir? The check?" END: Uncomfortable... Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Oh, don't you 'wait what' me. Acting all boo hoo is me that the object of my criminal acts won't interact with me! "Utterly ridiculous. You act like a baby whose favorite toy was taken away. "Tell me. Have you ever thought about her since that day?" [["Oh...Oh God...Amanda...we were just kids, I-I don't even-"]] [["I..."]] [["Yes."]] [["...not in the way I should."]]

"Is that so." [["Yes it is."]]

"Anything to assuage your guilt, huh?" [["Hm?"]]

"Coward." [["Hm?"]]

"Invasive? Invasive is you stalking a girl from your youth to see where she is!" [["...wait. Wait a minute. Don't I know you?"]] "Invasive is you writing POETRY on her social media forums to try and circumvent your damn restraining order!" [["...wait, what?"]] "INVASIVE IS BREAKING INTO HER HOUSE AND SETTING IT ON FIRE!" [["I, I dropped the lighter, I'm so sorry, I just wanted to scare you!"]] [["God, God...help me..."]] [["No! I-I was just trying to show off a trick, I didn't mean to! I wanted to impress you!"]]

"How so? How have you thought about her that day?" [["Please. Please stop."]] [["I..."]]

"And what way is that? Do you lust after her? Wish she would marry you? Perhaps you think she should forgive you?" [["Please. Please stop."]] [["What forgiveness could I ask for?"]] [[*crying*]]

"Wonderful. Let me explain the hours and pay then. "I'll order you another coffee." END: A Little Frosty, But Maybe You Made It...? Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"You shouldn't." [["I..."]] [["What...what should I do..."]]

"Here. I ordered you a coffee earlier. You haven't drank it. "You should. "And then you would be making her day." [["What's...what's in it."]]

"I think you know, Mister Johnson." [["I do. I..."]]

"Don't talk. Just drink. "...I can't say I'm sorry that it's come to this. I'm not. "But I am sorry it was on such a nice day like today. The sun is out. The clouds are fluffy. "Close your eyes. "And maybe you'll be forgiven." END: ... Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Then I'm not sorry for what I've done." [["What...what's going to happen..."]] [["You bitch."]]

"I'll stop. "Not because you asked. "But because I'm late for another appointment. "Mister Johnson, I don't think this work relationship will work out. "Have a good day." END: Abandoned Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"What forgiveness do you think you could get?" [["I..."]]

"Shut up. Pitiful. You were more of a man when we were children. "Do us both a favor and stay out of my life. "I'm leaving. Do not follow me. "...hope you die." END: Crying In The Club/Diner Want to try [[The Interview]] again?

"Nothing. Mister Johnson, I think this ends our interview. You'll hear from us in two to three weeks. Thank you for your time." END: You Did Not Hear Back Want to try [[The Interview]] again?